Ishshah’s Story is pleased to welcome once again the writings of
Virginia of Nairobi, Kenya.
A wife and mother of two sons, Virginia has graced us with two previous submissions –
Running for Cover and
Steadfast in the Dark Night of the Soul
When our first baby was born we were no doubt at the top of emotions. To say we were overjoyed is an understatement. I remember seeing my very calm and collected husband dancing in the delivery room as the baby gave his first cry. The baby was not as rounded as we had imagined; I guess no one had told us that sometimes they come with wrinkles, et al. In a few days, our son of course was the cutest little thing in the world…just like all other babies.
Oh, I thank God for the gift of babies! See how they bring joy when they make their first cooing sound, pee on your face and pick up a rattle. The first day they say mama or dada is the greatest. So is the day they take their first step. Such was my utopia until …
One day I went shopping with my son who was by then two years old. With me was also our latest addition – another son barely three months. Then my cute, ‘perfect’ two year old threw his first tantrum. He wanted to keep going up and down the escalator and I was not comfortable with that. Besides, I was in a hurry and with the little one, this was not the time to entertain ourselves with an escalator.
The shopping complex was pretty full with people shopping for the approaching school term. I could feel eyes of disapproval from the old. I sensed they were thinking, “hmm…how hopeless are today’s parents”. I could sense the piercing eyes of young executives probably thinking, “What manner of problems is this! I am glad I don’t have them”.
The embarrassment lasted until we reached the house. There I dealt with the matter the best way I knew how. And the boy has never thrown such a tantrum again in a supermarket …
This experience left a mark in my life, a good one for that matter: a realization of the hopeless state of man from his birth to the last day of his life when it comes to pleasing God.
Genesis 6:5 – Then the LORD saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intent of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. (NASB)
Jeremiah 17:9 – The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; Who can know it? (KJV)
The two boys are growing and have done all manner of boys’ mischief. They promise to be good and they try; they sometimes succeed but they also fall short many times. How many times do we also promise ourselves to do better next time, to stand for Christ in a stronger way, to be more patient? In short, to be more Christlike. But before the promise has settled, a judgmental thought or a moment of fear and anxiety creeps in. And the accuser of the brethren is right there reminding us how we are failing again.
The matter of the Christian walk is not as simple as doing good, for in our attempt of doing good we fail miserably. Paul in Romans chapter 7 paints a very clear picture of our struggles to live the Christian life. But thank God that He knew our weakness, our imperfections, our inability to please him that He gave us a Way. He sent the Physician for the broken, for the incapacitated, not to fix us but to give us a new life through which we can please Him.
This plan works when we stop trying harder, when we accept we can’t, when we die to our abilities and surrender to the One Who can. Now we can rejoice in our weakness as we allow Him to be our righteousness.
How I pray that your testimony, my testimony and the testimony of the Bride shall continually be a resounding:
“I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.” Galatians 2:20 (NASB)